Friday, October 18, 2019

A choice was made

I had to decide to play in one of two events in Indiana and there were things both good and bad in each event and with the entry deadline looming, chose to play in the closer event in the same time zone even though there is not an age protected division that I would be competitive. However, there are a couple of 50+ players who will be in my division including the one who while having the same rating at an event in June shot the exact same score for both rounds as I did.

As I looked at the 14 player MA50+ division for the other event this morning (including the person who beat me in a playoff in 2016 and the person who won MA50+ at an event I finished third last year,) I saw a recently registered player who could have changed my mind.

A top FP50+ pro in the area is playing in the MA50+ division. She has played in multiple MA events in different divisions and only plays FP50+ in elite ones. Her rating is very similar to mine and I would have wanted to see first hand how she plays the game and how "Candace" would do against her.

There is a Chicago area 8 time major champion FP50+ player and in the events where we both play including the one on Oct 27, her scores are usually better than mine but I rarely get a chance to see her play as we are usually far from each other on the course.

I then remembered playing little league in 1978 on the mound against a female batter. Compared to others who pitched, I was not that good and only took the mound when the game was out of hand but was able to strike her out and said something along the line that she should not be in the league which coaches and parents were not happy to hear.

I then realized maybe that is likely why the next time I was at the plate the first pitch hit me. Never thought of that in the 41 years since it happened.

Friday, October 4, 2019

The price of Joy

I am sore, tired, and completely defeated. I really wished the 2018 version of me that qualified for this event was here this week and not the broken down fraud that is currently wearing a sweaty shirt with my last name on it...

This was posted to Facebook from the parking lot of Boulder Woods Disc Golf Course in Wellsville, PA after I finished my sixth and final round of the PDGA Amateur Worlds on July 26th. Five and a half days prior to this post, my attitude was different.

Though my right knee popped out of place in my sleep 48 hours previously, I was on my way to my "last of a lifetime trip" to the 2019 Disc Golf Amateur World Championship in York, PA.

The drive there was the most anticipated thing and due to Spotify. I had my tablet loaded with hours of music that has shaped my life and every time a song played, an awesome memory was rekindled. Multiple times on the trip my voice cracked being unable to sing along due to how emotionally powerful it was to me.

While delivering food in June with METV FM playing they mentioned a song that you may have missed before. Joy by Apollo 100. All of a sudden, I remember the awesome instrumental which I have likely not heard in decades. (I know it is based on a classical piece but this version is the one I enjoy.)

There was a special set list for my trip. It had the songs I played at the start of the trip and Joy. When I was about to get to Coyote Hills (the furthest west course of those used for the event) to get some practice, I turned on that song and it was rolling through my head the rest of the day.

The next morning, I had to head to tournament central to check in and just before I got there once again played Joy and the tune was running through my head as I got my swag for the event.

I knew going in the highlight was everything before playing and it exceeded expectations. The staff there congratulated me for being there and while wearing a shirt with a drawing of me on it, had a huge smile on my face knowing all I went through to get to this point especially after having to give it up four years previously due to a lie.

After getting a bag of small items (including a tick extractor which I actually needed the next day), multiple hats, discs, and shirts, I had one more line. The person asked my name and division and stated box #15. I then realized what was in the boxes.

The staff person sorted through the lime green shirts with the tournament logo and sponsors on it and found the one with my name and player number on it. For some reason I was expecting it to be missing or spelled wrong but it was correct. After barely being able to choke out "thank you" I rushed through the pro shop that players had to pass to exit to get to the car.

I had always thought the phrase "tears of joy" made no sense but it took over five minutes for me to compose myself to the point where I can drive a car to one of the courses to practice.

At a college auditorium that evening, I got my player badge with my name and had to post a picture of it immediately after sending grateful messages to many who helped me get there.

The next morning was round one. Joy was still running through my head after playing it just before I got to the course among the first there. It was still running through my head as I was energized at the start making multiple long putts to keep things going well.

On my twelfth hole, reality hit hard. The body said no and the next six holes featured shots I have never missed so badly before including one where while trying to stretch around a tree, the disc stayed in my hand instead of releasing and dropped six inches in front of me on the follow through.

The last 97 holes over those four days were not all bad and I actually hugged the 7 baskets I managed to get a birdie but it was mostly ugly play featuring moments when I had no idea where to aim not knowing where my disc was going to go. Between my talent gap to elite players and my leg, my 108 hole score was 101 worse than the person in first.

Through the frustration on the course and the pain off it which after the last three rounds kicked in on the walk back to turn in my scores as the adrenaline from the round subsided, the "Joy" I tried to keep in my head faded.

After making the FB post mentioned at the beginning, I changed out of my gear and started to head west. The plan was to drive until I was tired and then find a hotel for the night. After passing through four mountains, I came to a turnpike rest area to pee and get something to eat.

Though gimpy, I decided to not use the crutches I brought and hobbled into the building. After three paces inside, both legs seized up and if there was not a chair close by, I likely would have gone down. There were tears but they were not of joy. People asked if they should call an ambulance.

Eventually, I made it to the bathroom where I noticed my face was bright red and then got some food. I decided to get a hotel sooner rather than later and this time used my crutches to help me. The hotel staff was able to get me a handicap room due to the difficulty I had walking.

In spite of the pain medication I was taking, the idea of sleep seemed remote as it was not working at all. I needed all my energy to get out of bed to pee and after plopping on the bed, felt that I was done.

I did not want to return to reality. I did not want to deal with life anymore and most of all, I wanted the pain to go away. Then I realized there is enough pain medication my bag to accomplish those things.

I did not want to call anyone knowing that the response I get could influence my decision and not in the way most would normally think as my decision to continue needed to be mine and mine alone. I also did not want to worry anyone while I was three states away from home or have someone rush to my hotel room to "save me from myself".

Though tempted, I was so drained and the bag seemed so far away, eventually I did fall asleep. The next morning, my legs were somewhat functional and I managed to hide my discomfort at a family gathering on Saturday before returning home on Sunday afternoon. Once I got home, I could not stay awake for more than an hour until Tuesday morning. When others mentioned the Chicago area Weird Al concert from that Sunday which I missed, I realized ahead of time that I would unlikely be physically up for attending.

It took a couple stressful weeks to get back to normal thinking and though I remember the Joy experienced on the trip, I will never forget the price paid for it.

Thursday, September 26, 2019

24 hours of really little change

On Sep 25th, I had to get multiple trailers received and put away since I knew I had to leave at 1130 sharp to head to court over an hour away.

Since I was travelling from work and not home, I used GPS which took me on a route which I soon recognized as the one I take to Dellwood Park which I passed 8 minutes from the courthouse and three minutes later passed the Old Joliet Prison. (Which explains why Dellwood hosts a fall event inside there.)

Unlike the morning session I attended earlier in the month, there was no line at the metal detector so I was inside 30 minutes early somewhat confused as my document stated to head to the payment location. Soon, someone from another case and I found out what actual court room was being used and went there to check in.

I was disappointed when the judge entered the room as the other party in my case had yet to arrive and didn't until about five minutes into the session. That allowed me to see the previous cases in which all there (but one lawyer) were wearing a t shirt with writing on it as opposed to the regular collared shirt I sported. All previous cases had a child involved and needed parenting classes so having one that's 19 was a help.

Due to the improper and incomplete paperwork involved, it took a little longer than anticipated but the divorce was made official and since not much was joined 20 years ago and much of what was is no longer joined, there was not much to separate. We agreed if something belonging to the other is found to contact the other party which is fair.

After sending a group text and calling my mom, 20 minutes later I was on the tee of #13 at Dellwood making a subtle FB post about the situation similar to the FB post last month where I made a subtle reference of getting laid at the PDGA Worlds in July. (Since the bathroom and pro shop where I got water were next to #13, that is where I started like some players do and anyway, that is more appropriate for me.)

I really wanted to birdie #13 just like I birdied my last hole as a married man. I threw the disc as intended but being off by one disc it turned over too much and after making it through the brush short right, ended up about 30 feet long about 10 feet below the basket. It was physically difficult for me to get to the disc and my approach hit the pole under the cage (and stayed there.) At least, I birdied #14.

When I have not played a course for a while, I will forget things that are not hole specific like the fact that there is a lot of downhill and uphill walking at Dellwood even when not needing to do down a hill to where a shot ended up. I was fortunate that the three put in the river (one slightly off shot, one back kick, one bad shot) did not wash away. After my 11th out of 20 (13-18, 1-6, 6a, 6e, 7-12) the legs were done and the last couple full shots showed.

My initial plans were to find a buffet after but my sister wanted to meet me for a celebration dinner and she suggested the Outback about halfway between where we were. I had not been to the building since it was converted from a Cheeseburger in Paradise and had not been to an Outback since I was "happily married" well over a decade ago.

Possibly influenced by the half plus glass of Miller Lite (in a FB picture many liked) "to celebrate", by the time I was done with the meal, I was ready to sleep. Getting up off the chair was almost embarrassingly difficult. I made it home, found out the water was still out from construction, and fell asleep before 9. Woke at one, confirmed the water was back, set my alarm, and went to bed.

I wanted to get to work early but only managed to get there on time. Fortunately things were not as bad as it could be and after deciding that a weekly thing usually done on a Thursday can be done the day after, the day has gone well though my legs are tired. Those here who have seen the effects my situation has put me through over the last couple decades congratulated me. It is more a relief than anything.

Multiple people have asked me about meeting someone else. Though instincts have kicked in on occasion, my brain eventually responds with "WHAT THE **** ARE YOU THINKING?"

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

I - Zero - S

Having run Scrabble tournaments, I appreciate the work required to run disc golf events and occasionally end up helping before, during, or after.

For me, the best area events are the Illinois Open Series (IOS). Mike Krupicka, the PDGA head of Illinois, is the one in charge and treats the events like a sports competition as opposed to a hangout and there are things done at an IOS event that are not at any other which I appreciate. This year, having played in three of the four events, I got a poster displaying the artwork used for the trophies.

I can even go to their site shortly after an event (including the most recent one which had 180 players on three courses) and see a hole by hole score by all players there from pros to a nine year old whom I only beat by twelve total shots in August.

My only issue with their events is the same one that often happens and that is inability to play to my expectations most of the time.

The September 22 event (the 99th in the series) was my 22nd in the IOS and since I have figured out the mathematical odds of sports teams, cities, and Canada from failing to win a title, it is appropriate to do the same for my failure:



So why have within 22 events, I have only two seconds and one third? In many of the events, I was overmatched (defined by me as playing against at least one person whose rating would be expected to finish at least ten shots better). Before I was officially diagnosed and treated for arthritis, I would choose to play in MA3 rather than MA4 since MA3 was on a Sunday which would give me one day off before the event. I do admit in one event I should have played in MA4 as all divisions played on that Sunday.

Even though I am better than I was in the middle of the decade, the top local players in the MA50 division are still significantly better than me and it would take having a lot of things go my way like it did in September to even think about winning. In a non IOS event in 2019, my best lifetime combined two round rating still ended up one shot out of first against a top local player.

In the IOS events, there was only one time of the 44 rounds played where I had the best score in the division but on that day in the second round, a more experienced player on the more difficult version of the course made up the gap in three holes and pulled away for a comfortable win. In the event I finished second by one shot, my rounds were the 3rd and 2nd best of those in MA50 and within the first 21 events, the closest I came to winning was 5 shots and there were two events I lost by more than 30.

There is optimism for 2020 and beyond as long as my body stays viable as physical issues were a big part of the poor first half of my 2019 season. However, I know anything can happen at any time physically to me including while asleep.

Monday, September 23, 2019

Making the highly improbable happen (almost)

The phrase "highly improbable" was used by Douglas Adams in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy series of books and though that term is likely designed for things like being struck by lightning or winning the lottery, I like using that term to describe things in my life even if not in the original intent..

There was good reason to not be optimistic about winning the Illinois Open Series 2019 closing event in Rockford for multiple reasons. There were two elite players who registered for my event and of the other 10 rated players, I was 8th and one of the two unrated players finished higher than me at the previous IOS event in Oswego 4 weeks prior. If there was gambling, I would have made myself 50-1 to win.

My goal was to possibly finish in the top half of the field and collect a small amount of merchandise credit. What actually happened was that another player on the last hole had to make a 15 foot putt to beat me by one shot for first. How did this happen?

Problems at the top. Two players who were registered chose not to play including the second highest rated one. The top two remaining players, including the highest rated one in the state were in a group that failed twice in its first 5 holes to play to the correct basket (other groups in our pool made a similar error) of the two that most holes on the course use. There is a two shot penalty for each violation and both of them eventually withdrew from the event. The UDisc app (which I now use after making multiple adding errors this year) had course layouts for the event per pool so I could look at my phone and know which basket and tee pad to use to make sure we were correct.

The courses design. The two Anna Page park courses played by the MA50 group were mostly beyond the range of the players in the division first shots making birdies difficult to get and putting a premium on approach shots. The player who won did not get one in 36. My three came on a 40 foot putt, throwing a drive as hard as I can to reach a basket, and putting one in from over 100 feet.

The weather. No doubt the 2-3 inches of rain that fell in the 24 hours including during most of the event were a factor. Having dry skin, a slow walkup to my drive, and not having much a preshot routine made the rain less a factor for me than other players. I don't think it is a coincidence that the other player who usually chooses a disc and immediately throws won the division.

(In an event two months later where a cold, windy drizzle was falling all during the event, I won the MA50+ division by six shots that equaled the score posted by the MP50+ winner who is an eight time major champion in female events so apparently bad weather hurts my game less than most.)

Also, I prepared for the weather. I had plenty of towels with me to use and still had a dry one left while other players did not have one. I also wore for the first time rain gear which helped keep my arm and back warm as well as using my old pair of non slip work shoes which prevented me from slipping on wet tee pads even after walking through the mud that was present in round two.

Friday, September 20, 2019

Too many special shirts

As I looked for a specific shirt to wear tomorrow, I realize how many I have just for specific situations and not just expected ones like the WKRP Turkey drop shirt or the Die Hard December sweater.

FuMPFeST and Marscon Dementia track shirts are worn when there.

Grumpy t shirt - Got it for a team trivia contest where we were Snow White characters. I wear it many work Fridays since that is my least favorite day to work as my happy Fridays are ones I am not working.

Charlie Brown wearing Jason mask with Lucy's dead body behind her stand - Got is as a present. I wear it on Friday the 13th.

Charlie Brown kicking Lucy's head off - Bought it on line. Would wear it for either fantasy football league draft or a party for the NFL league championship game. I don't play fantasy leagues anymore and now watch the game alone so I can fast forward past commercials and singing since it is only a game and that is all I want to watch.

Integral calculus shirt - Saw it at a con, did the math, realized answer is 69, and asked how much it costs. Wear it on June 9th and will wear to see Bill and Ted 3.

Marscon bus shirt - Got it to wear when I would drive people to Marscon. Since my "Christmas" has evolved into playing a disc golf major event, I now wear it on my trip there.

Madman on the loose shirt - Got it to wear at Marscon party as shown in my profile pic. I now wear it when I check into a disc golf major event as the PDGA chose the image for my player profile page.

Hail Sagan - Purchased it on line. I wear this on Nov 9 and Dec 20 in honor of the astrophysicist birth and death dates.

Miami Dolphins Hall of Fame shirt - My sister got it for me when she was in Canton, OH. I wear it on December 25 as it depicts someone actually born on that day. I would also wear it after the team wins a game in a special situation which seems unlikely this year.

I want Tile - Got it because it is the tag line of a group of sketches. I now only wear it on September 21 as that is what I was wearing when my father died.

Thursday, September 12, 2019

Six have died

According to reports a sixth person, a woman in her 50s, has died due to exposure from using vaping products. To me it is not surprising that inhaling vaporized juice can cause damage to lungs the same way that tobacco smoke can.

What is surprising is that the government is promising swift action to "protect its citizens" from this product. I then started to wonder in what timeframe do six Americans die from ...

• being unable to take necessary medicine to keep alive due to the high cost of the product?
• not getting vaccinated for a disease due to unfounded fears of the product?
• accidents created by someone who is intoxicated or buzzed?
• motorists that ignore construction or police on the side of the road?
• disease caused by poor living conditions such as toxic water?
• not having a roof over their head or enough food to eat?
• a law enforcement officer who made a decision to act that was influenced by the color of someone's skin?
• being overseas wearing a military uniform in a war which those who started it have been long dead?
• suicide after being unable to cope with life following military service?
• suicide after being traumatized by others because of what they are?
• attacks because of what they are?

And ... How quickly can six Americans die when one person gets hold of a weapon designed to kill many and uses it on a group of people?

Though I appreciate the idea of the government protecting its citizens, there are far more significant things to examine than vaping.