Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Marscon 2015 by the numbers

People in the vehicle: 6
People in vehicle when it arrived at my house Wednesday night: 2
Temp Fahrenheit Thursday morning: 0
People picked up downtown Chicago after Amtrak was almost 3 hours late: 2
Extra miles driven to go downtown: 42
People who ate at IHOP on Thursday night: 11
Different states those people call home: 6
Max people who could sit it either hot tub before it overflowed: 5
Number of ice machines on the room floors of the hotel due to construction: 0

Minutes spent getting pair of shoes at Mall of America: 5
MOA Food places closed due to renovations: 4
Places in Mall of America that sell Coca Cola: 0
Years I have taken a picture of my left hand giving the finger to a Pepsi logo in the south food court: 5
Dollars spent on "premium" Cold Stone Creamery vanilla ice cream cone with no toppings: 6
Pocket and actual phone calls made to/from my sister before we got a hold of each other: 5

Stairs from 1st floor lobby to 2nd floor: 18
Stairs from 3rd floor room to 2nd floor: 19
Times I used stairs on Friday causing my left leg to be in pain the rest of the weekend: lost count
Dollars spent on hotel stand cheeseburger/chips/Coke meal three times over the weekend: 9
Dollars spent to register for weekend though I was in January informed in an email which I foolishly erased that I was registered: 60 (I sent the email unsure if I registered. Since I can't confirm that I registered, I had to pay.)
Flyers taped or reattached while opening ceremonies sketch was rehearsed: 30
People I saw use the schedule flyer to find out what performance is when: 5
Hours it took for Pizza Hut to fail to deliver since the driver could not find the correct hotel: 2 1/2
Times Bill Putt said "oil can" in opening ceremonies sketch: 12
Number of concert spots changed due to travel issues and one cancellation: 4
Guys who Carrie will never sleep with who headed towards stage as she did that line: 14
Songs in Sponge Awareness Foundation Air Supply medley: 5
People in "sex" section: 2
New Devo Spice videos (including one still in production): 3
Different beers consumed on Friday: 2
Different mixed beverages tried in Klingon party room: 6
Times person mistook a written letter on a Klingon mixed beverage for a number or vice versa in a five minute gap: 2

Number of people doing aerobics in the pool Saturday morning: 13
Number of children in the pool about the time it ended: 15
People who attended first ever afternoon showing of Dementia wrestling: 35
Wrestlers who were booed as they were introduced: 2
New items in Luke Ski's opening bit: 6
Songs in new Luke Ski video that he finished late Wednesday night: 2
Points in Q*Bert that Luke Ski's high score is less than mine: about 18,000
Songs in TV Kyle's show that were written before February: 1
People that joined Power Salad on stage during Corned Beef and Cabbage: 8
Of them those who danced instead of drinking coffee: 7
Age of Tony Goldmark, the youngest person with a main stage concert: 31
Songs Rob Paravonian did that I had heard before the weekend: 1

People I knew who I saw do karaoke on Saturday night: 8
Times I looked at a karaoke book and had to remind myself "NO!": 2
Times I heard someone I didn't know perform in karaoke Carry on Wayward Son after a clip of that song was played during opening ceremonies: 2
Adult beverages consumed on Saturday: 0 (all alcohol needs to be out of my system for 24 hours when I take my arthritis medication which I was planning to take Monday)

Times I matched Luke Ski's answer in the four Match Game style questions he answered as a panelist in the Flopcast panel: 3
Times I matched another performer's answer in the same game out of 28 total answers: 3
Songs performed in the FuMP Jukebox: 5
Songs performed in the Smackdown: 15
Smackdown songs that the performer created: 2
Smackdown songs covering another artist who was there: 2
Smackdown songs created on stage: 1
Total artist merch items purchased: 4
Artist merch item that became available on line as he got on the stage: 1
Percentage of artist merch by all artists on the table that I own (or purchased) once I download that artist's item: 100

People from Marscon who ate at Khan's: 34
People who joined group for dinner realizing a performer was in town: 1
People excited by that person who took a pic with him: 3
Difference in cost of meal in cents on two different tables serviced by two different waiters depending on beverage ordered: 1 or 5
People who participated in what has become an annual Sunday night podcast taste test panel: 11

People at Monday morning breakfast: 19
Increase of cost of Monday buffet breakfast in dollars from Sat or Sun without anything else being in it: 4
Podcast episodes played on ride home: 2
Total musical albums played on trip: 7
Temperature Fahrenheit when back at my place: 52

Friday, February 27, 2015

Breaking out the white

I recently realized the only time I wear t-shirts that are white is at Marscon. Normally I don't like white shirts as they get dirty easily but Marscon has become the exception. Here is a list of the shirts I wear exclusively (for the most part) there:

Bus shirt: As the Dementia Bus (named either the Whitehurst or the Blindwulf) was the popular way to get there in the late 00s, in 2008 we needed two of them and Sara was kind to drive the other one. Luke drew a pic of all 15 people who were on it that year and it was turned into a shirt that seems to get smaller every year but I still wear on the Thursday we head to Marscon.

The artist shirt: In 2008, probably the craziest and wildest Marscon (at least from the pictures from it; then again when a platoon of soldiers join the Saturday night party scene what else would you expect), the theme was Press Start to Continue. Luke drew every performer as a character from a video game and Bill turned that into a shirt which people could order. Every year Luke has continued that and every year, I order a shirt and Spreadshirt was kind enough to replace mine after the initial one had a printing error. This is the image from this year where the theme is Heroes, and Wizards and Fae, Oh my:


Note: Lindsay Smith drew it, Kyle Carrozza inked it and Luke Sienkowski colored it. I wear the current years and a couple past years shirts periodically during the weekend.

New this year is a white version of the shirt advertising the Marscon Dementia track.

On Saturday night dinner I wear a shirt my daughter got me with the phrase burp loading along with a status bar.

Late on Saturday, I wear the shirt with the logo of my radio show that Luke drew as me. That is the shirt I am wearing in my profile pic.

In the after con group pool gathering Sunday night, I use my white Worm Quartet "official nipple covering apparatus"

In the past I have worn my white Dementia Radio t shirt which for some reason I lost and was hoping would find when I moved but didn't and since 5 performers from a convention called Dementia 2001 will be there there might be a pic of people who were there and I need to find the white shirt from there to pack.

I even wear a few non white shirts there. Why do I wear so many in one weekend? The excitement of the weekend (and in the past the alcohol) causes me to sweat more than normal and I change shirts often for my (and others) comfort.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

I will never watch another "Super Bowl"

First of all, this is Ken Sherlock. My computer and account were not hacked.

Those who know me are aware of my knowledge of the game known as the Super Bowl. I can rattle off what team beat what other team, all the game MVPs mentioning the two players (Harvey Martin and Randy White) shared the honor in #12, most likely the score of the game, and something else most people don't know about it.

So why the title statement?  I am aware I think ... unlike others (pause intended). In my lifetime, the Super Bowl has changed from the championship match up of the American and National football league winners to the championship of the merged National Football League in 1970 played on a Sunday afternoon to a Sunday evening multimedia extravaganza event with celebrities having an on field presence choked to the brim with sponsorship causing people who don't care about the game to mock it or provide deliberate alternate programming.

I am not interested in the National Anthem which has been forever ruined by Whitney Houston on coke sounding like she had a vibrator between her legs causing others to try to make it from doing their "special" version of the song most annoyingly Chicago Blackhawks performer Jim Cornelison who has made a career out of over singing one fucking song and grandstanding by pointing at the flag. Thanks to the military presence that has occasionally been paid to show, the National Anthem has also become a recruitment tool as well.

I don't care about the momentum changing fucking halftime show and to be honest if Weird Al Yankovic was performing, I would not want it though I would probably watch a recording of it later. Commercials? No, no, no, NO! To be honest if there is a commercial I want to see, I can watch it later online.

To me that is what the Super Bowl has become and I don't want that any more. I only want to see the game between the AFC champion and the NFC champion to determine the league champion especially when both teams had the best regular season record in their conference.

I realized that I can watch the game without the pageantry, commercials, and bullshit that has lessened my enjoyment of the game. I have a DVR. After the coin toss, I can pause the game for about 25 minutes, take care of other things off line, then watch the game skipping the commercials which advertisers paid millions for the rights to display. When I have to pee, I pause and take my time. When it is halftime, I will pause the tv and spend about an hour doing something else. In the past I have played Rock Band, shoveled snow, or played a board game. The second half I will do the same thing and skip commercials.

From this moment forward, I will do my best to stop using the term Super Bowl or the roman numerals. That name was not used until #3 and coined after hearing a kid playing with a super ball. In the future I will watch the National Football League Championship Game.

Fictional numbers 43-99

After my computer died, I lost the list I was creating. I restarted that project a few weeks ago and decided today is the correct day to post this as many of these numbers apply to football players. As with the other two lists, if anyone knows of someone who should be included, let me know.

43 - As with many of the higher numbers there is no real important character that wore them though I would guess extras have worn most of them in many movies. In the movie Cars, the King wore #43 but since that car was based on former driver Richard Petty who is known as the king who drove car #43, I can't include it. Also won't include numbers worn by Barry Sanders (20), Dick Butkus (51), and Jerry Rice (80) as well as others who played inmates in Necessary Roughness as they wore the numbers they wore in the NFL.

44 - Forrest Gump, University of Alabama. His name is Forrest. Easily over the Bad News Bears player who was a Hank Aaron fan.

51 - Ricky Bobby - Colt Trickle- NASCAR - Both cars in their final races had that number and since both movies were similar, calling it a tie.

53 - Herbie - multiple racing venues - Can't believe it took me as long as it did to remember this. Far more significant than Greg Brady.

59 - Pirate Steve Cowan (Average Joe's) Played by the talented Alan Tudyk

61 - Bodanski - Florida Penitentiary Guards team (1974 Longest Yard movie) Played by hall of fame linebacker Ray Nitchke and since this character wore a different number than Nitchke's 66, I will count it.

66 - Todd Flanders - Springfield youth football - He would stand next to his brother Rod who wore number 6.

68 - Peter Griffin - New England Patriots - Shipoopi

69 - Eric Cartman - South Park cows

72 - Brock Sampson - State University - Former Bodyguard of Dr. Thaddeus "Rusty" Venture

73 - Sampson - Mean Machine (1974) When I saw the movie as a kid, I did not realize two things. The person who played him also played Jaws in James Bond movies and that he did not originally say that he broke his freaky neck.

78 - Andre Kimm - Texas State - Played by Sinbad one of the few linemen movie characters who was not an extra or a sidebar.

84 - Bobby Brady - New York Jets - Worn in the dream sequence where he caught a Joe Namath TD pass.

85 - Rod Tidwell - Arizona Cardinals - Show him the money!

86 - Chuck Hicks - Piston Cup - Won the title when Lightning McQueen helped the King cross the finish line. Spoiler.

87 - Phill Elliott - North Dallas Bulls - Main character in dark movie about pro football played by Nick Nolte.

92 - Big Tony - Mean Machine (2005) - Saw The Longest Yard remake once and don't really remember him but there were 6 players specified in the movie and he was one of them.

94 - Anthony "Fridge" Johnson - Brantford High School - From the remake of Jumanji.

95 - Lightning McQueen - Piston Cup - Won multiple titles before racing against the best in the world.

96 - Charlie Conway - Mighty Ducks - Quack

97 - Switkowski - Mean Machine (2005) - Same as 92

99 - Ricky Vaughn - Cleveland Indians - I really wished they did not make a sequel.

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Marscon non musical overview

What makes Marscon more special is the non performance events. Here is my ratings for those:

Mall of America trip B+: Unlike last year, the hotel for the convention is close to the mall and within walking distance on a warm day. Since it is the first week on March, that won't be likely but the hotel will have shuttle service. The overwhelming Pepsi signage in the building along with the fact that Diet Mountain Dew (the only Pepsi beverage I can drink) is not available anywhere in the building is the only deterrent in the trip and inspires me to take a flippie of the sign in the south food court every year.

Opening ceremonies A-: Luke usually with Earl Luckes put together the only convention opening ceremonies sketch ever worth watching. I was honored to help with the FuMPet show production from a couple of years ago.

Dementia water aerobics A-: Though I usually am in no shape (physically or otherwise) to participate in it, this event done by Kornflake who is a certified instructor is something which I am glad exists. Since there is no more fan showcase (as is was discontinued after I sang in it last year) it is starting later on Saturday and if I am not too worn out, I might participate or at least curse out Agent Luke Bauer for shutting down the fan showcase after Dr Demento gave me written permission last year to perform in every future one.

Dementia Smackdown wrestling: A: This event was moved to Saturday afternoon after the past couple of years was on late in the evening causing everyone there tired. I really enjoy watching the artists themselves get worked up watching their avatars (created by Mr Tuesday) wrestle for the title.

The Flopcast live A: Over the past couple of years, the Flopcast (featuring Kevin and Kornflake) has become my favorite podcast. I was glad to be in the area when they were recording last year and will be there though not sure how awake and functional at Sunday noon when they record.

Party rooms B: Over the years as I have gotten older the rating has dropped since I can't enjoy them as I used to especially since I now have to prepare myself so I can enjoy them as they are designed. I am hoping  the FuMP karaoke CD files can end up in the karaoke room so they could be done there.

Kahn's B+: Other than Pepsi, it is a little sad to be there as it signifies the beginning of the end of the weekend as people start to head home at the time as they must.

Thursday, January 29, 2015

prop time 2015

Like the last couple of years this is what I would bet on Super Bowl XLIX: (hopefully this time in a font that posts)

These in base $100:

Wilson MVP +350 (X Brady)
Wilson first TD +1200 (X Lafell)
Brady over 36.5 att -135   +235
Brady 2 tot TD pass +250 (x4)
Gronk over 74.5 rec yd -125 (X68)
Wilson 3 tot TD pass +500 (x2)
Wilson over 42.5 rush yd -125 (X39)
Wilson rush TD +200 (X)
Gronk over 100 red yd +190 (X68)
Wilson first Sea TD +600 (X Lynch)
Sea wins 19-24 +1400 (X)
Sea first TD of game by rush +400 (X NE pass)
NE under 24.5 pt -115 (x 28)
Sea over 24 pt -115   +215
Sea -14.5 +450 (X)
Sea -7.5 +240 (X)
7 total TD +500   +600
Sea 5 TD +750  (X3)
2 tot FG +350   (X1)
tot 51-60 +275  +375
missed FG +110  (X)
NE 4th down conversion +130  (X)
Sea 4+ players score +120     +220

These two bets would be for base $500 as opposed to base $100

Seattle win -105 (X)
over 48 tot -115  +1,075

As one can tell from the bets, I have Seattle winning by a large margin. (38-17) Why? Over the past two seasons, Seattle is 8-3 playing on natural grass while New England is 2-6 with one of the wins by three points over a team that went 1-15. Since the game will be played on natural grass, this matchup between two otherwise even teams should not end up close.

Total bet $3,515
Total collected $2,720
Net result -$795

It was ironic that the two interceptions that Seattle got took out two starting players which New England was able to exploit to score 28 points. I am still stunned by the play call on second and goal from the one yard line with plenty of time. Though a touchdown would have given Seattle the win and probable victory, I would have lost one prop bet and possibly gained another if Wilson is named MVP.

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Theater sitting

For me there used to be confusion describing where I was sitting in a theater or where someone was going to be on stage since stating right and left is usually followed by asking from the performers or audience point of view.

Thanks to two songs, describing it is now simple and easy:



What songs? :





When I told my daughter we are in the 21st row on the trees side of the drugs section, she understood exactly what I meant. I also stated the water seats cost $263.50 each when I searched.