Triggered

The following was posted to Facebook from the back aisle at Woodmans on 7/18/24 and shortly removed after since it is best posted here:

After a second straight frustrating day at work late trying to get enough done so tomorrow, I have half a chance of getting everything done in time so I could go to Oswego after work for a flex start, stopped for the 6 at Springfield Park with carry bag since unsure is cart will work on ski slopes Sunday... *breathe*

Starting at 3, final drive on 2 skidded next to basket and woman walking her dogs commented on the shot.

My mind which was feeling better as it marked third straight pink Buzzz SS bullseye to finish started trying to figure out what to say since multiple cousins on both sides of the family asked me or my mom this month about me remarrying and the only encounter I've had the past 12 years was an awkward one after a financial transaction in York, PA 5 years ago and appatently playing the best disc golf of my life doesnt ****ing matter because I will likely be found dead alone in my apartment after not showing up for work...

After babbling, "thanks", realizing don't even try, waddled to car. Ooh, 22oz Tapoica pudding. That will help.

Eligibility again

After expensive legal action in 2023, an agreement allowing a transgender female to play female open pro on the gisc golf pro tour for all events has been reached and the first half she was competing against a very pregnant player. Many believe as opposed to a blood test that having or have had components to birth a child should be the deciding factor for female eligibility similar to what USA swimming chose.

Since she was second going into Sunday in Iowa, hearing the start of the round was delayed made some think there was a death threat made since it happened in Tennessee earlier this year.

Other restrictions in disc golf divisions have a simpler to determine factor be it the year someone was born or their rating based on how well they have played.

Due to good play and a couple tree breaks, was one shot out of first at a one round event in April and got aggressive going for a tying birdie only to hit an early tree taking a double bogey. After the round, discovered the player I was one shot behind had a rating too high for the division I was in and though he was reassigned, I still lost by one. I could have easily hit the same tree with a conservative drive and still taken double bogey but the mindset would have been different up one.

The club challenge which I usually play separates players by a different rating maximum per pool of players and with my significantly improved play, am no longer eligible for the lowest pool and with the higher pool overloaded with better players, I won't be able to participate. Though disappointed, had you told me in July 2019 or July 2023 what my new lifetime high rating at "MA59" would be, I would be happy.

For some reason, get the feeling of negative reinforcement for what I do in disc golf to be better.

Taking the fun out of things part two

During round one of the 2023 IL State Championship at Dellwood, things were meh until I made a long birdie putt followed by a parked drive, and 4 in a row full shots that flew 10 feet plus each farther than normal leading to two more bonus birdies. (Figuring out why and being able to duplicate that often is part of the reason my rating hit a lifetime high in July, 2024; 20 points or two shots better per round on an average course in one year.)

My round rating was 5th lifetime best (at that time) and I was leading the MA55 division and had a better score than the MA50 leader. On my way home, had to fight the urge to stop at a coworker's house, show him the leaderboard, and tell him that is why I put my body through disc golf and for telling me to quit he should go fuck himself.

Highland Park where round two was is a course I can't figure out and after a failed hero shot on the last hole to try to tie for second ended up way out of bounds ended up 5th.

I was not satisfied with how poorly I played or handled the pressure of the situation but now am more pissed off at the TD of the event.

As with most events, players for round two are paired by standings with those farthest out of the lead for a division first and the lead card going last. Though on the lead card, I teed off second even though I had a one shot lead. When I mentioned it to the TD, he stated it was no big deal and at the time was trying to focus on my game.

Since order of play changes every hole depending on what players score, it technically isn't a big deal but going first on a lead card to start a round is an honor and for someone who had never had a solo lead in over 50 B tier or higher events, it would have been a positive memory as opposed to what it is.

Since there were over 400 players to assign for round two in almost 20 divisions, there was a lot to do but confirmed with multiple tournament directors including the head of the Illinois PDGA that for me to not go first required someone to manually change the order that was initially assigned by the PDGA program.

There are events where the top player throws last on the lead card but have never seen someone in my situation listed as second. To be honest, had a mistake been admitted would be understandable but to be told it is no big deal is an insult to the money, time, energy, and physical pain and discomfort I experience from playing tournament disc golf.

When it was time to register for 2024 IL states, nope. Maybe if I end up a solo first on one of the hopefully 4 more B tiers to play this year and throw first on the lead card, I'll consider 2025 especially being MA60. As of now, there are many other events to play.